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Really!!! Snapping your gum!!!!!!!

November 30, 2011

So I met the rudest person ever yesterday. She said and I quote,

“Yeah, I completely understand where you are coming from; let me see what I can do for you.”

Not so rude right? Well it wasn’t what she said that made me so made I stormed out of the room and wrote a very nasty review. It was how she said it. Not only was the tone of her voice like that of a 6 year old bully stealing someone’s lunch money, but she was snapping her gum, slouched over,  zero eye contact, tapping her foot, and above all, after she spoke she smiled as if she was Macaulay Culkin from the Good Son.


I was applaud, though am that body position is a big part of impression management I have never actually seen someone fail so miserably at it.

So if I were to give a class to this young woman on how to improve her body language in order to not piss off ever customer here are a view things I would include.

Dan O’Conner gave me three very good ideas with his blog

The O-N-E Listening Tactic Everyone Needs: Body Language


  1. Open Posture
    1. For the lady that I encountered, if she had lifted her chest off the table and actually faced me she would have shown more confidence. A strong posture indicated value and preparation. It shows that some is ready to answer any and all questions and that they are confident in their answer
    2. Nod your head
      1. Even when it is something you disagree with. It shows your customers that you are engaged in the conversation. It shows that you are acknowledging what they are saying and you hear them. You don’t have to say, I HEAR YOU or I GET YOU a simple nod will suffice.
      2. Eye Contact
        1. HELLO I thought this was a given but unfortunately it is not. When someone looks in my eyes I think, yeah, ok they see me, they care, I am important. But when someone avoids eye contact I think, what you are up to, what did you steal, who you are really working for. Eye contact is a sign of trust. Within our personal psychology eye contact is a sign of sincerity. When you make a child apologizing you say, look into my eyes and say you’re sorry.  Or even when someone is confessing their love they look “deep in to the others eyes” PLEASE PEOPLE REMEMBER TO MAKE EYE CONTACT.

A few more tips that are not mentioned in Dan’s blog are mentioned all over the place

Don’t swivel

Stand still

Don’t fidget

If you can’t hold an object still put it down

Don’t ware dangly jewelry


And many more; Effective communication with your body is not hard. It is being aware of what you are doing. Making sure that you are not holding or moving items around that may distract your customer. It is knowing what you are saying!!!!!!!!!

Altering your body language to actually fit the words that are coming out of your mouth! If you are giving bad news to someone you don’t want to be smiling or jumping up and down erratically.  If you are trying to tell someone that you “Understand the problem” you don’t want to be grinning like a jack ass, because they will call you as a Jack ass. It is like it has been said for years and years

It is not what you say; it is how you say it.

And one day you will snap your gum at the wrong person!!!  So be aware J

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